lee_fallon | PSL - The Wedding Night

It's late by the time they get home, after dark, a little tipsy from the wine they drank at Semele's but not so much so that Eric couldn't drive. They walk to their door and Lee, who's had a bit more wine than Eric because of the afore mentioned driving, is itching to touch his brand new husband, his hands wrapping around Eric's middle as Eric works to unlock the door, head falling to kiss the side of Eric's neck.

He know he's hindering the progress of the door being opened, but he doesn't care. He doesn't want to stop touching, stop kissing, and so he keeps mouthing at Eric's pulse point, one hand dragging up Eric's shirt in the front to palm his belly.

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"Jesus, Lee," I breathe aloud for like the millionth time. It's insane the way he can wind me up and make it so I can think of literally nothing but sex. I'm overwhelmed with his hands and his lips, his tongue and his cock. I'm so horny I don't even know where to start. I need to think...just for a second.

So in the bedroom I pull away, out of arm's reach, just so I can get undressed the rest of the way. I look at him the whole time, the way his lips are puffed from rough kisses, and, God, that heat in his eyes. I can't get undressed fast enough.

Lee trembles as Eric pulls away from him, but he keeps his eyes locked on Lee’s, his hands moving to remove the rest of his clothes. He’s almost done when Lee realizes that maybe he should be doing the same thing, hurrying to pull off his shirt and tie, working his shoes off at the same time then pushing his pants down, his underwear, all of it a tangle around his ankles. This is when he stops to breathe, stooping to step out of each leg and pull off his socks too, and he’s naked and flushed when he stands up straight again, his chest heaving with his breaths.

They stand there for a moment, a few steps apart, just looking at each other. Lee’s not sure they’ve ever spent this much time looking at each other without touching, and his eyes move over the lines of Eric’s body, his compact torso, dusky skin stretched over muscles. Licking his lips, he wonders for the millionth time how he got so lucky to end up with someone so gorgeous, and maybe he’s always had a lingering worry that Eric will realize that he’s with someone so much older, aged even more by his illness, and decide he wants someone younger and hotter and more alive. But he doesn’t have to worry now, because Eric is his husband, and the way Eric’s looking at him he doesn’t feel old and sick anymore, he feels loved and wanted utterly.

“We should make love tonight,” Lee says softly, his voice shaking. “Slow and tender. Do you want to?” he asks carefully, trembling a little with how completely in love he is.

"Yeah, I do," I say, then swallow hard. "I want you in me. Slow."

And then I approach him, totally keyed up but I control myself so I can touch him lightly, tracing the plane of his chest down over his belly and then I take hold of his hips. I can feel his scar that's like a time bomb, the start of a count down, but I'm not thinking about that. I'm only thinking that this is probably the happiest I'll ever be and I want tonight to be perfect.

So I kiss him again, but this time without fire. This time only tender and sweet.

Lee wraps his arms around Eric's shoulders, holding him close and kissing him slowly but deeply. He's still full of passion and desire, but he's tempering it down now, funneling it into a slow burn.

As they kiss, Lee walks then closer to the bed and he has a notion of picking Eric up and laying him down, but he knows there's no way his brittle body will be able to manage it. Instead he urges Eric to sit on the edge of the mattress, and normally he'd probably get to his knees and suck Eric's cock, but he doesn't want to be away from Eric's mouth for that long. So he moves onto the bed too, he and Eric shifting until Eric's laying in the center of the bed with Lee laying over him, Lee's pelvis cradled between Eric's thighs.

I hook my arms around his waist and hold him close. Closing my eyes I get lost in the kissing, letting the whole rest of the world slide away to nothing until all I know is the taste of him and the softness of his lips.

"I love you," I whisper between kisses. Not that he doesn't know, not like he's forgotten...I just need to say it.

"I love you too," Lee breathes, his voice low and thick with desire and emotion. "God, Eric, I love you so much," he goes on, kissing Eric's mouth and his jaw, his throat, the side of his neck. When he gets down to Eric's shoulder he sucks a bruise there, not too dark but enough that it will stay for a couple of days, a mark of possession. Eric has a ring and that's more than enough, but Lee wants Eric to know how much he loves this, that he gets to have Eric all to himself for the rest of his life.

"Don't move, baby," he says softly, moving to kiss Eric's cheek before moving to the bedside drawer to retrieve the lube. He settles back between Eric's thighs, sitting on his knees and urging Eric to lift his legs and open himself up, Lee watching with dark eyes as Eric spreads himself wide. "God, you're so beautiful," Lee breathes. "Every part of you."

I draw my knees up and the second he touches me I can't keep my eyes open. They roll back and fall shut and I gasp at the first cold pass of lube. And then my hand drops to my dick so I can stroke myself, partly for my pleasure and partly so he can see how much I need him.

This is so much more than I ever hoped for. Love. Real love. Marriage. Marriage to a beautiful, brilliant, classy fucking man who loves me just as much in return. I don't even try to keep quiet, there's no reason for it.

"I...I want you. I need you, baby," I gasp out, my thighs already trembling.

“I need you too,” Lee replies, his slick fingertips tracing the circle of Eric’s hole, not teasing but admiring, taking the time to see the way it clenches beneath his touch before he slides on long finger into Eric’s heated body. He keeps looking down, watches the way Eric’s body clings to him as he pumps his finger in slowly, the desire in him burning hot, but he makes himself go slow for now, slipping a second finger inside, stretching Eric bit by bit.

“Your body is so amazing,” Lee says, seeing the way Eric’s thighs tremble, how his scrotum tightens around his balls as Lee fucks into him, watches Eric’s fingers ride up and down the length of his beautiful dick. He scissors his fingers inside, drawing them back in a vee to loosen Eric a little more before he turns his hand to find and trigger Eric’s prostate, a gentle caress and a promise for more.

He hits it, right there, and I gasp and arch and immediately exhale a harsh moan. Sparkles float in my vision and I grip my dick hard like I need to to anchor myself to the world and like I need to keep from coming there on the spot. I'm not going to, but Jesus...it's so intense.

"Don't tease," I beg breathlessly. "Please, baby. Please, Lee, I need to kiss you. I need you in me."

Lee swallows hard and nods, licking his lips as he pulls his fingers free and grabs the lube, quickly slicking his cock. He moves over Eric then, both hands next to Eric’s shoulders, and he dips his hips, finding Eric’s hole without using his hands, just shifting his dick up and down the cleft of Eric’s ass until the head catches Eric’s rim. And then he pushes inside, all at once with no warning, filling Eric deeply and suddenly, forcing a broken cry from both of them. It takes him a moment to recover, but once he does he leans down and finds Eric’s mouth in a wet kiss, his hips starting to move, slow and deep and firm, Eric’s body trembling and clenching around him.

“Oh baby,” he groans against Eric’s mouth, taking Eric evenly but gently, not fucking him, making love. “Oh god, you’re mine, you’re mine forever,” he whimpers. “No one else, only me, only me inside you like this, only me."

I wrap my free arm around him to keep him close so I can keep kissing him. His words mean everything to me, hearing that. I'm his. All his. It's just what I need.

"Only you," I promise against his mouth. This is so slow, so sweet. I mean, I was careful with Todd but I've never been screwed like this. Made love to, I guess. It's so fucking perfect I can barely stand it. I'm cool with hard and fast but this is...it's almost too much.

I gasp and it's almost a sob, then I pull him to me and kiss him eagerly, aching to be a part of him. Like, we're as close as he can get, him sunk into me to the root, but I want more. I want, this is fucked up, but I want to be, like, in him. In his skin. Heart to heart. Trust me, the way it feels in my chest and gut isn't gross at all. It's like an all consuming need.

I want to tell him how much I love him but I can't. That would mean stopping kissing him and I can't make myself do that.

Lee hasn't had sex like this in a long, long time. It's the sort of thing that requires real feelings, a deep connection, love, and he'd been so scared to let himself feel those things, to let someone else feel them for him. If he'd had any warning with Eric he would have tried to stop it, but it happened so fast, from strangers to soulmates in mere hours, and Lee hadn't had a chance. He fell in love before he knew what was happening to him, and there's no turning back now, no stopping it. He loves Eric more than he's ever loved anyone, and he knows, no matter what happens, he carrying that love with him to the grave.

They don't stop kissing, they can't, their mouths fitting and moving together like they were made to do it, Lee's body shifting to bring them together over and over, as close as they can be without sharing the same skin. Lee has a half wild thought that he wishes he could have Eric inside him now too, that they could be lost in each other, wrapped up in some kind of impossible tangle. Maybe after this they can do it the other way too, complete the circle that way, but for now this is more than enough.

Lee doesn't realize it until he tastes salt on his lips, but he's been crying for a while, tears leaking from between his closed eyelids and rolling down his cheeks. He sobs once softly into Eric's mouth, breaking from the kiss but leaving his forehead touching Eric's.

"God, I'm so in love with you," he whimpers, and he wasn't paying attention before, but the buzz of his orgasm is closer to the surface than he realized, making his breathing hectic. "I love you, Eric. I love you so much," he manages, his voice quavering with emotion.

"Shh, baby, shh...it's okay," I say when I realize he's crying. I reach to wipe the tears off his cheeks before any more can drip on me. I hug him tighter with my legs, digging my heels in a little.

"I love you, too. I love you so much. I'm all yours, Lee. All in. And you're mine and I'm not letting you go," I promise. It comes out jerky, in gasps, and I wish it could say more, say it pretty, say it like it feels. But this feels too big, too massive to even be put into words. Love. Love's a good word but it's not big enough. And maybe I'm just fucking stupid but I don't even know a bigger, better word for it.

"Come in me," I whisper. "That's what I want most. I want you in me. Come on, baby. Please. Come on..."

Eric looks so beautiful and sweet and young beneath Lee, his big, wide eyes staring up into Lee’s, and Lee can’t believe this incredible person wants him, wants him enough to be married to him. There’s a part of him that wonders if everything will change when the shine starts to come off, if Eric will start to think he’s made a mistake, but he hopes not, he hopes he’ll just get better and they’ll be happy and Eric will still look at him this way.

Pressing his forehead against Eric’s, he keeps his eyes locked on Eric’s as he focuses on the feeling at the base of his spine, the slow burn of his orgasm building and building. He can’t help the way his eyes flood again, but he’s so in love, and he’s so scared it’s going to end too soon. He never, ever wants it to end.

His breath hitches and he trembles, his hips stuttering as he chases his climax, a few more broken thrusts and he’s coming, pushed up deep and spilling himself inside Eric, filling him up. His breath sobs out of him, and he presses his face into Eric’s neck, hiding his face and the fresh wash of his tears.

I hold him then, arms and legs wound around him so he can't get away. I'm never going to let him get away, not until...well, til death do us part. But I don't want to think about that right now. I don't want to think about cancer or dying when he's alive and well, his heart pounding so hard I can feel it against my chest.

"I love you, baby. I love you," I whisper, one hand creeping up to hold the back of his head. I can feel the way he starts to flag, not quite as solid inside me as a moment ago, but I like it. I like everything about him and this. Making love. Fuckin' new to me.

Lee keeps his face tucked against the side of Eric’s neck for a few more moments, and then he stars kissing Eric there, tasting the salt on his skin, Lee’s tears and Eric’s sweat. He trails his mouth up along Eric’s jaw, then finds his mouth, kissing him sweetly, deeply. “I’m sorry,” he says against Eric’s lips, his eyes fluttering open a few seconds later. “For crying,” he clarifies. “I know it’s not very sexy."

"Shh, it's okay," I promise him, touching his face gently. I trace the curve of his brow, then the shape of his cheek bone and finally the line of his jaw.

"God, you're beautiful," I tell him. "How did I get so fucking lucky to find you and have you all for my own? How is that even possible?"

Lee feels his face go a little warm when Eric calls him beautiful, and he doesn’t know how someone who looks like Eric could think that about him, but there’s nothing insincere about Eric’s tone, about the expression on his face.

“I feel the same way,” he says with a watery smile. “You’re gorgeous, Eric. You’re amazing and alive and you have so much time in front of you,” he goes on. “Why do you want to be stuck with me?” he asks with a broken laugh.

"I don't think I'm stuck, old man," I tease. "I think I'm right where I want to be. I love you. You're amazing. You are. Amazing."

I steal another kiss, then I look at him and wet my lips.

"I could ask you the same question, you know. Why'd you want to be stuck with some dumb kid who doesn't know shit about...shit?"

“It doesn’t matter what you know or don’t know,” Lee replies, loving that they’re having this conversation right in the middle of having sex as a married couple for the first time, further proving to Lee that this isn’t just a physical thing between them, that it’s so much more than that. “You love me,” he goes on, shaking his head softly. “And I love you. That’s all that matters to me.”

Taking a breath, Lee leans down to press his own kiss to Eric’s lips. “This is exactly the life I always wanted,” he says softly. “Meet a guy, fall in love, get married, grow old together. I gave up on that yeas ago, but then I met you,” he says. “And the night we met, you said, if you were me, you wouldn’t keep yourself from falling in love, that you’d use every last second you had left to be as happy as possible.”

He has to stop and swallow, emotions clogging his throat again. “Then you gave that to me,” he finishes, unable to keep the quaver out of his voice.

I hug him tight and hold him close, too overcome to really say anything. This is all too good to be true, and yet it is. It's true and real and I have him and I'm never letting go. I close my eyes as the rims begin to burn and I can't keep from tearing up. Fucking sexy. I'm sure we're quite the picture, naked and tangled and crying our asses off. Hot.

But it's real. Nothing I've ever done in my life has been as real as this.

"I love you," I tell him, my voice tight and high as I try not to actually cry.

Lee's a little relieved that Eric is as moved by this as he is, and he turns his head to kiss the side of Eric's neck, then his cheek, then his mouth, slow and warm.

"I'm sorry this got so emotional," Lee says when he finally draws out of the kiss. "I mean, you haven't even come yet," he adds with a laugh. By now Lee's cock has slipped out of Eric's body, and neither of them are hard really, but Lee is nowhere near ready to be done with this for tonight.

"Do you want to move at all?" he asks softly, reaching up to brush his fingers over Eric's cheek.

"I don't even care," I tell him, draping my arms around him heavily so I can just enjoy kissing him. I mean, yeah, I want to get off, but right now that doesn't seem half as important as talking and having this connection that feels like it's physically tying my heart to his. How can I possibly be so fucking lucky to fall in love with this man and have him love me so fiercely in return? I don't even know, but I'm not going to question it and I'm certainly not going to complain. This, here, with the weight of him on me and my arms around him is like, fuckin'- I don't know. Perfect. It's perfect.

Lee smiles at Eric's reply, and he settles in for a long string of kisses, slow and deep, languid and aimless. This isn't about sex, it's about sharing their hearts with each other, connecting and becoming one. They're bound together now, legally yes, but also in the commitment they've made to each other. They've promised each other forever, and even if Lee's part of that isn't very long, in his soul it's a lot longer than weeks or months. If something miraculous happens and Lee beats his cancer, he isn't going to change his mind. Eric is it, the one, and he'll be devoted for Eric until his very last breath.

They kiss for a long time, and when Lee finally pulls back to take a breath and meet Eric's eyes, his lips are tingling and swollen, and Eric's look dark pink and bee-stung, even more inviting than usual. Lee lifts a hand, his thumb brushing over Eric's cheekbone, down along the side of his face and over his jaw, down the center of his throat.

"You're so beautiful," he says, his eyes moving over Lee's face, admiring every plane, the soft mocha of his skin, his long, dark eyelashes, his soulful eyes.

Kissing him is like heaven, but when he pulls away and looks at me like that it makes my chest ache and my stomach flip. Like, I can see him loving me, in love with me, and I never thought anyone would ever feel this way about me. I just, well, I didn't give up, but being here I just never thought about it. And now he's here, he's mine, and he loves me. And he thinks I'm beautiful- I'm not sure I am with tears smeared on my cheeks, but I believe him anyway.

"I love you, Lee. I love you so much," I say softly. "You are everything I could have ever hoped for. Dream come true, or whatever. I really mean it."