PSL - Bitty Learns Lee's Secret

[lee_fallon]

Lee feels terrible. When he told Eric on New Years Eve they should get together for a lunch date soon he hadn't been planning on feeling sick enough to finally go to the hospital, and he definitely hadn't expected to end up on chemo again. So when Eric texts and asks if they can meet tomorrow, Lee can't say yes. He's miserable and exhausted and even if he thought he'd be able to eat, Eric would be able to tell immediately that something bad was going on.

He texts back and tells Eric he's sorry, he's sick and he can't make it. He adds a hopeful 'Maybe next week?' to the end, knowing there's not much of a chance he'll look any healthier by then. He knows he can't put Eric off forever, but he thought he was done telling people he cares about that he's dying. It's selfish, he knows, but he just isn't ready to do it again.

Bitty's reply is kind and caring, saying he's sorry and sending hopes for Lee to feel better soon. Lee thanks him, then sits down on his couch, his body heavy, letting himself doze.

Comments

[lee_fallon]

Lee smiles at Eric, shaking his head. He's met a lot of people like Eric in his life, so beaten down by what people have told them over the years, parents or teaches who didn't give them the support they needed, bullies that convinced them that they were worthless and not good at anything. Lee's gay, and he was lanky and awkward as a kid, so he's had his taste of that too, he understands how it works its way into your mind and won't let go. It's taken him a lot of years to get to a point where he can say he's proud of himself, where he knows how talented and capable he is, and doesn't let his doubts get the best of him.

"You don't have to be Gordon Ramsay to be considered a good cook," Lee tells Eric, taking another bite of his soup. It really is very well flavored, pleasant and warm and comforting. "Life's too short to spend time talking people out of the compliments they give you. It's a lot easier to say thank you," he adds with a warm smile. "Trust me, I'm old enough to know how these things work."

[puckandpie]

Lee takes a bite and I carefully watch his face, watching for a grimace or a scowl or any indication at all that he doesn't like what he's tasting. But I don't see even a glimmer of that and I let out a breath I hadn't even realized I'd been holding as I dip my own spoon in for another taste.

I can feel my face flushing warm as he continues and I let out a nervous breath of a laugh and shrug. "Well, then... thank you. I feel pretty confident about my baking these days, but less so the cooking. There's just so much to know and I get distracted from learning all that much because I just want to bake another pie. Also, I'll take being Nigella Lawson over Gordon Ramsay any day."